Toronto Maple Leafs vs. Montreal Canadiens Game 1 2007-08

From Frikipedia

After two bubbish losses to the Ottawa Senators, including one in overtime, and one match that was contrived by the referees, where the Leafs scored three goals legally compared to the Senators two (and still somehow managed to be credited with the loss), we get ready for the puck drop in the first Habs vs. Leafs game of the season.

Friki desperately hopes that this will be the Leafs first win of the season, while Friki's brother, the fan of the other squad, is just hoping he can escape when Toronto loses without having the remote soundly thrown at his skull in a moment of friki frustration.

Contents 1 Pregame 2 First Period 3 First Intermission Report 4 Second Period 5 Second Intermission Report 6 Third Period 7 Overtime 8 Friki Review 9 The Molson Three Stars in association with Celtic Crosses 10 Friki's Unanswered Questions 11 Game Highlights

Pregame

• 8:04 pm - Maple Leafs arrive on the ice, led by newly acquired starting goaltender Vesa Toskala. A collective sigh of relief from 19,323 fans is then heard throughout the Air Canada Centre. Friki, and each member of the Leafs Nation were dreading a return by last year's starting goaltender and goat, Andrew Raycroft.

• 8:09 pm - A mostly french version of O Canada is sung by a 4-man barber shop quartet...who can't all seem to sing each word at the same time. Friki is laughing at the absolutely unrealistically voiced bass singer going "bum bum bah buuum" in between the "God Keep Our Land" and the "Glorious and Free".

First Period

• 8:11 pm - Puck drop. Face off won by Montreal...crowd cheer of "Go Leafs Go" silenced early.

• 8:13 pm - Great blocker save by Canadiens' starting goalie Cristobal Huet...Friki is expecting this to be the first of many...

• 8:15 pm - Canadiens score. Friki throws the remote at the TV. It was mad scramble in front of Toskala...3 leafs standing still in the goal crease as Toskala does the belly flop, and Mathieu Dandenault pots his first goal of the season. That didn't take long...3 minutes of play in the 1st period? Its going to be a long night.

• 8:16 pm - Friki's brother is cowering in fear in the corner couch, glad the tv remote control received the brunt of the wrath this time. He wouldn't dare gloat about the goal.

• 8:17 pm - BANG! Bullet shot from leafs D-man Ian White means its a tie game, 1-1 less than a minute later. WOO! Yeah. A bullet. Friki's brother is resting a little easier but is visibly disappointed by the goal...

• 8:19 pm - WOW, What a SAVE by Huet. Impossible save. Almost 2-1 there but Huet did his best Patrick Roy impression and gave habs fans visions of 1993. Vesa Toskala then makes a solid save at the other end, but Leafs fans don't get any visions because its been so long since they have had a goalie of that kind of legendary status, that any fans that could possibly remember it are old and enfeebled.

• 8:27 pm - After a bit of a lull...ok friki was getting a sandwich and watching from the kitchen..so sue it...the first penalty of the game goes to the Montreal Canadiens' forward Christopher Higgins for interfering with the Leafs' goaltender. Friki would be pleased, if the Leafs had not gone a combined 0-for-17 on the power play in the first two games of the year against Ottawa and displayed sheer ineptness with the man advantage.

• 8:31 pm - Predictably, the Leafs dicked around and passed the puck to nobody in particular, allowing for easy clearing plays, and never even looked close to scoring on the PP. Friki has seen UNB teams with better puckhandling skills than Pavel Kubina. That makes it 0 for 18 on the year...oh joy.

• 8:34 pm - Bob Cole refers to Canadiens' top player Kovalev as one of the "scrappiest" players out there. It sounded like "crappiest" though, so friki giggled a bit. Incidentally, Kovalev is about as tough as a newborn baby kitten.

• 8:37 pm - Leafs fall victim to the infamous "even up" call. Andy Wozniewski gets a holding call on a play where Higgins fell like he was shot as soon as he felt Wozniewski's clammy hockey glove on his shoulder. Do they actually call unsportsmanlike penalties for diving anymore?

• 8:39 pm - Pavel Kubina gets the gate for tripping the aforementioned Higgins who is flopping around on the ground like a jellyfish in this period. So back to the penalty kill then...
• As a sidenote, Friki has just noticed that the obligatory time clock in the top-right corner is conspicuously absent in this game. Presumably this is due to technical issues with the CBC production. God damn public TV...here are our tax dollars at work, people! I really wish I kenw how much time was left in the penalty.

• 8:42 pm - Suprisingly the leafs kill the penalty, despite not looking like wanting to. As the announcer on the PA announces "last minute of play" friki is shocked at this, as he wouldnt know because of the lack of a TIME CLOCK...CBC is enduring friki's full wrath now.

• 8:44 pm - The period ends, tied at 1's across the board (if you could actually see the scoreboard on the screen, that is, F-U CBC). Leafs star Mats Sundin avoids a mandatory 4 minute penalty when he collides with Habs' Defenseman Mike Komisarek, "cutting him wide open" just before the end of the period. Montreal coach Guy Carbonneau is raving like an acid head who's sucked up three grams of ketamine through his eyeball. Friki is laughing at him, in full knowledge that they got ripped. Leafs know how it feels to be on the wrong end of bad calls so friki's sympathy level is low.

First Intermission Report

• Don Cherry's outfit is atypically subdued for the Saturday night season opener. A mustard yellow wide tie and corsage is much less hard on the eyes than the abominations hockey fans had to endure throughout last year's playoffs.

• Friki understands that the streaming version of the game on cbc.ca DOES in fact have graphics. It is suspected that the re-formatted edition for non Hi-Def televisions cuts off the scoreboard. A clever ploy by the HDTV people to make us spend money on HD's when the questionable benefits of the product itself have not convinced the average consumer that it is actually worthwhile.

Second Period

• 9:04pm - Things have just gone pear shaped in Leaf Land. Leafs super-pest Darcy Tucker collapses in a heap behind the net with an apparent injury, and leaves the ice holding his foot in the air. This is not good news, as a broken foot kept 2nd leading scorer Tucker out of the leafs lineup for 20 games last season. Memories of an injury plagued 2006-07 are rushing back.

• 9:05 pm - No sooner had Tucker's carcass been scraped off the ice, the leafs are penalized again, this time its Chad Kilger. Luckily they kill it off.

• 9:11 pm - Another goalie interference penalty for Montreal, but friki is amused by the music playing on the PA as he walks to the box...Alice in Chains "Man in the Box", in which the second line is "Shove my nose in shit".

• 9:12 pm - The Leafs power play has hit a new low, as Montreal scores SHORTHANDED. Does this now mean they are minus-1 for 18? Embarrasing. 2-1 Montreal. Shove my nose in shit...

• 9:19 pm - Friki is losing interest in this game, as the shorty felt like a stiff kick to the nuts from which it is questionable that the leafs can recover from.

• 9:20 pm - CBC is advertising an all new episode of Dragon's Den. Don't get too excited, its the Canadian version

• 9:23 pm - Leafs get another power play, as Montreal's Latendresse has been naughty and is sent off to bed without any dessert. Friki is scared, given its nuts are still sore.

• 9:27 pm - The bad news is that the Leafs did not score on the power play, nor did they even look like scoring at any point. The good news is that they didn't get scored on. So minus-1 goal on the PP for the season then. I think they are looking for a new record in absolute futility.

• 9:30 pm - Leafs fourth-liner John Pohl takes a shot from a sharp angle that Huet catches in his glove, and then gives the big glove-flail making it look like it was a much harder save than it actually was. Evoking further memories of Patrick Roy and his showman embellishment, then.

• 9:34 pm - Canadiens' score another goal, as the Leafs defense decide to take a little vacation. After 3 shots point blank on poor Toskala, Andrei Kostytsyn rolls in and buries the 2nd rebound into the net...Friki is glad it doesn't have to try and say his name, only write it, because it is sure that it would permanently damage its tongue. $7.5 Million dollar traffic pilon, sometimes defenseman, Bryan McCabe walks sheepishly back to the bench on this one with the typical "I fucked up" look on his face.

• 9:37 pm - Friki's dire mood is improved by Alexei Ponikarovsky's late 2nd period goal, coming with only 1:10 left in the period. Friki's tongue is perfectly fine with this goal scorer. Poni is a bute...even if his handle can't really fit on the back of the jersey.

• 9:40 pm - The second period comes to an end, with the score Montreal 3, Toronto 2. The Leafs have the Habs right where they want them. After last season's propensity for blowing leads in the third period, and having that trend continue in the first two games against Ottawa, friki is actually pleased that it will not have to explode in frustration as the leafs blow another one at the final hurdle (no innuendo intended). If they are going to get the win tonight, they will have to come from behind. Perhaps they should ask Richard Dean Anderson for advice on that (innuendo intended)...

Second Intermission Report

• After 57 years of television coverage of the NHL, how come CBC still hasn't figured out how to put anything entertaining on in the second intermission? The bla-bla-blas of random talking heads on "After 40 Minutes" has put friki to sleep for the past 15 years...at least it provided ample opportunity for a bathroom break.

• Friki would like to note that at some point in the 2nd period, the caption bar returned, but is now located at the top of the screen, and stretches from left to right across the whole screen width. Like every other pro sport in the world...congratulations CBC on getting out of the stone age! Now if only you can get to work on having it available for the entire duration of the game!

• Who the fuck is CBC radio's Gian Gomeshi, and why is he looking at me like that? I'm officially creeped out.

Third Period

• 9:54 pm - The puck drops on the third period. Leafs look like they might actually be trying to score and tie this thing. Don't go to fast, there's still time to blow the game...

• 10:01 pm - The Leafs follow through on Friki's premonition. Ponikarovsky pots his second of the night to tie the game 3-3 on an excellent wristshot that seemed to have eyes. Friki is worried though because there is still 17 minutes left for the leafs to blow yet another 3rd period tie game. If it was up to Friki, they would score with 1 second left, to avoid having to "hang on" for the tie or win for any length of time.

• 10:02 pm - Immediately after the Ponikarovsky goal, leafs get a penalty, and take the first step at blowing yet another game. The quest to go 0-for-3 on the season continues, and Friki will be there to bring it to you!

• 10:05 pm - The leafs kill off the Montreal power play, and CBC a replays the Leaf's tying goal. Commentator Greg Millen proclaims that to be "a very important goal for the Toronto Maple Leafs". No shit. Thanks for your contribution to the broadcast. FAIL.

• 10:08 pm - Millen redeems himself in a moment of confusion, when he correctly proclaims that the reason the play had been stopped was because of a Montreal hand pass. Very good then. You are officially more competent than James Allen.

• 10:11 pm - A very tense moment as Montreal hits one off the crossbar that lands in Toskala's goal crease. The net-cam shows that the puck might very well have been in across the goal line, under Toskala somewhere, but he displays excellent foresight by making sure he lies down like he was dead and doesnt get up so that anyone can actually see where the puck was. Breathe again, Friki.

• 10:15 pm - TUCKER LIVES. LONG LIVE TUCKER! He's not dead after all, which means Friki expects you to score a goal, you bastard.

• 10:21 pm - Leafs are buzzing around the Montreal net. They are clearly carrying the play, and looking like the better team. Which only means one thing. The Canadiens will score the winning goal any minute.

• 10:23 pm - Darcy Tucker farted along the boards? Wow, that must have been loud if Bob Cole can hear it from the broadcast booth. Or maybe he could just tell from the disgusted look on the faces of the players on the Montreal bench. Oh wait, he said "Fired it along the boards..." ahhh...Bob Cole's Newfie accent comes through again!

• 10:27 pm - After rediculous non-call after non-call, the referee waits till the last possible chance to screw the Leafs over and not allow them time to catch up. And so, Wozniewski off to the penalty box with just under 2 minutes to go. Friki is beyond ANGRY to see this happen again. Friki sees men in black and white striped shirts in its nightmares.

• 10:30 pm - The leafs survive to Overtime and each team earns a point. Now they go to a five-minute Overtime period, where the next goal wins. Should nobody score, they go to the contrived and ever-popular shootout, which will determine who gets the "bonus point".

Overtime

• 10:33 pm - Mats Sundin almost scores, and then proceeds to punch Andrei Markov square in the mouth, knocking him flat on the ground, in a scene reminiscent of the time that Friki tried to stand up to a bully in third grade. So back to the penalty kill then. But this time in OT with no margin for error. Friki thinks the 0-for-3 on the season bid is looking extremely likely now. Balls.

• 10:35 pm - *PING*. The Canadiens put one off the post that you can hear ring from New Brunswick. Surprisingly, Bob Cole makes the call with absolutely no emotion, and deadpans "Thats how close this game was to being over". All those who say Cole isn't a "Leafer" are shuffling their feet looking at the ground, with a sheepish grin on their faces.

• 10:38 pm - Pavel Kubina breaks his stick, and has to run to the bench for a new one, thus making it a 4 on 2 player advantage, and in a farcical display of numerical superiority, Montreal plans a perfect play and Toskala makes an absolutely mind-blowing save. Andrew Raycroft at that moment has the sudden realization that he may never play another NHL game. This fact of course, makes Leaf fans breathe yet another collective sigh of relief.

• 10:42 pm - In purely ironic fashion, Montreal takes a penalty for holding the previously penalized Mats Sundin, and with 1:30 or so to go, it comes at just around the same time that Toronto got penalized in the third period, for a similarly invisible infraction. At this point, Friki would like to comment on the new found celebrity status of the league's referees, who tend to decide more games than the players themselves by calling penalties at key times of the game. Maybe they are sick of making a small fraction of the money that the league's worst player receives, and just like to express their displeasure by pissing them off at every opportunity.

• 10:42 pm - SCOOOOOOOOOOOOORES. It took no time at all for the Leafs to get their first Power Play goal of the season. In keeping with the irony, the first game winning goal of the year came from the man that never shoots the puck, Tomas Kaberle! Screams of frustration can be heard in the upstairs room at the friki homestead, as friki's brother left and is watching the tense OT period from the comfort (and safety) of his own room. Friki is ecstatic but is half worried that the universe is collapsing, because it can't be that the leafs would 1. Win, 2. Score on the PP, and 3. On a goal by Tomas Kaberle!

Friki Review

So the leafs finally get into the win column, at 1 win, 1 loss, and one OT loss, for three points in three games. Montreal's OT loss leaves them at 1 win, no losses, and one OT loss, for three points in only two games. So some consolation for Montreal fans, then, that they are still tied with Toronto, with one game in hand. Look for this trend to continue, as Toronto continues its quest to miss the playoffs by less than one win for the third straight season.

In watching this year's edition of both the Leafs and Habs, it appears very similar to last year. The same players and same coaches engaged in the same types of strategies as in 2006-07, and made the exact same types of defensive fuck-ups. Leaf fans can be forgiven for thinking "here we go again", as they are pretty much used to it for the last 40 or so years. It is questionable whether they are actually expecting anything different. Montreal fans are also facing the realization that this decade may be the very first in which a Montreal Canadiens hockey team did not win a Stanley Cup. Leafs fans feel absolutely no sympathy, as Toronto has gone four complete decades without having a parade down Yonge Street. It must be disconcerting as well to the Canadiens that they blew a 2nd period two-goal lead, just as they did in the final game of the season last year, against these same Toronto Maple Leafs. In one of the most memorable collapses in modern sports memory (or that friki cares to remember), the habs turned a late 2nd period 5-3 lead into a 6-5 defeat, in a game that they just needed to win in order to book an appointment in the Stanley Cup playoffs. So with the wounds of a season ended at the hands of the Leafs, a fresh painful defeat only serves to pour salt on them and prolong the disappointment. Friki is sustained by this knowledge.

The Molson Three Stars in association with Celtic Crosses

     1 Tomas Kaberle		        3 Celtic Crosses   (Now he should shoot more often)
     2 Vesa Toskala                       2 Celtic Crosses   (Exorcised the ghosts of Raycroft)
     3 Darcy Tucker			1 Celtic Cross   (Too dumb to feel pain)

Friki's Unanswered Questions

• Will anyone actually watch the heavily advertised mini-series "The Tudors" on CBC? An expose into how the monarchy became functionally retarded due to a limited gene-pool isn't on friki's to-do list, no matter how much they try and convince it otherwise.

• How long will it take Friki to jump off the Vesa Toskala bandwagon when he fails to stop an "easy" shot and costs the Leafs a future game, and ask for the abhorrent Andrew Raycroft to return?

• Is the Asian chick with the Blackberry in the Rogers advert truly a geoff, or is she actually crosseyed? Friki's opinion has been more changeable than Alexei Kovalev's desire to try and play hockey. Regardless, the inherent sexual tension is palpable and amusing.

• Will the NHL actually adopt a system for scoring games that is fair? In football, every game is worth the same amount of points (3), however the NHL insists on continuing with a system that values games that go to Overtime at 3 points (two for the winner, one for the loser), while valuing games that end in regulation at two points to the winner. Would it be so difficult to go to a system where each game was worth 3 points, where games that go to OT are worth 2 to the winner and 1 to the loser, and games that end in regulation should rightly be worth the full 3 points. This solution is so simple and obvious, and provides ample incentives for teams to play for the regulation tie instead of turning off the gas in a tie game to "send it to OT", that it is to logical to ever be adopted.

• Should the Leafs attempt to trail after 2 periods for every game this year, so that they can actually have a chance to win, rather than blow games in the final frame?

Game Highlights

TSN.ca Leafs Highlights