Toronto Maple Leafs
From Frikipedia
Simply the greatest professional hockey team in the world. Has legions of fans in Canada and receives more media coverage than all the other teams combined, due to its location at the center of the universe. The Leafs Nation are a strange crew who are loyal to the point of insanity. Similar to popular teams in other sports such as the New York Yankees, Chelsea, and Real Madrid, the Leafs have a huge budget and sell out every single game despite the fact that fans often have to pawn their left testicle to be able afford nosebleed tickets to a game against the lowly Minnesota Wild. Contrary to the aforementioned great teams, the Leafs differ in that they NEVER win. In fact, their last Stanley Cup win was so long ago there were only six teams in the league, which means its totally irrelevant. This sad fact is all that sustains arrogant and penile-deficient Montreal Canadiens fans. The Stanley Cup drought in the center of the universe does not seem to trouble Leafs Nation, so long as they are able to beat the Ottawa Senators in the first round or two of the playoffs - which they always do.
Contents |
Spelling Deficiencies
As most Leaf haters are aware, the Toronto Maple Leafs squad is named after tree foliage. However when pluralizing the team name, the uneducated hosurs didnt realize that you didn't just add an "s" when pluralizing the word leaf. This means that the logo creates a sense of bemusement and confusion when the team visits the American south to play the Florida Panthers or Carolina Hurricanes. Often, new fans can be heard saying "ain't those morans knowin' that thems sweaters is wrong".
Color Blindness
The founders of the team, in addition to being clearly stupid, were also color blind. In designing the prototype for the Maple Leafs jersey, they accidentally purchased blue fabric. This mistake was replicated in all subsequent team logos and so far, no member of Leafs Nation has even questioned the existence of blue leaves.
Famous/Infamous Players
Although Martin Rucinsky never played for Toronto (one of the only professional teams in the world he hasn't laced up the skates for), the Leafs had their own encounter with greatness in the form of noted sniper Benoit Hogue. Benoit Hogue ends all games. Such is his power. Most of the time, he would choose to end the games at 60:00 minutes, however in the event of a tie he would often decide to let the game go on a bit longer. Andrew Raycroft on the other hand, ends all games in the other teams' favour.
Notable Past and Present Players
- Vesa Toskala - G
- Andrew Raycroft -G
- Jason Blake - LW
- Mats Sundin - C
- Nik Antropov - RW
- Bryan McCabe - D
- Tomas Kaberle - D
2008-2009 Season
Toronto entered the 2008-09 season in what has generously been called a "rebuilding phase". The objective of the season is to allow for the new General Manager to trade away any signs of talent in exchange for draft picks and prospects in order to ensure competitiveness in the long run.
See also
Toronto Maple Leafs vs. Montreal Canadiens Game 1 2007-08
Categories: Sports | Hockey | NHL Teams
