Shane Warne

From Frikipedia

The greatest Cricket player of modern times, thrusting Australia into a position of utter dominance that lasted over a decade, perhaps beyond. Tactics include spinning the ball at right angles, appealing when he bowls a wide, mating with local women and attempting to save his hair. His spinning finger is his second most prized posession behind his SMS'ing finger. Other favourite items include his Ferrari sportscar and his spawn, of which he has 73,825 roaming the planet. Despite this fact, he is still a bit of a bummer.

The Ashes 2005

Due to Australia's utter crapness in the 2005 Ashes series, Warne was left to not only take all the England wickets, but also try and score all of the Aussie runs. He only just failed.

Famously spent the run up, and much of the opening day of the crucial final Test sledging Paul Collingwood, claiming he was only in the England team because he had caddied for Michael Vaughan at a charity golf tournament.

The sledging failed early on day two, when Colly hit Warne for six, before turning back to the portly Adonis and informing him "That was a three wood, Shane."

The Future

Is expected to stop playing when he is 121, it is likely he will die when he is 99 though.