Chippy

From Frikipedia

Provider of fish and chips.

Despite the fact that all chippys are independant shops, every chippy in the UK has the following as standard:

• Big jar full of pickled eggs and pickled onions. They would have last sold one in 1986.
• Shelf full of special chippy vinegar.
• Big poster on the wall advertising some sort of food they don't actually sell.
• More staff than there are customers in the shop at any one time.
• One member of staff picking his nose before sifting his way through your chips to coat each one liberally.
• One member of staff who manages to make the questions "open or wrapped?" and "salt and vinegar?" sound exactly the same, making you look like an idiot.
• Well stocked drinks cabinet full of cans of pop with Arabic writing on them.
• Massive price list with half the letters missing, making you question whether you want an "-ad-o-k" with or without "m-sh-y -eas".

Incidentally, the price list in chippys tends to be merely a guide. This has led to the almost popular game of Chippy's Price is Right.

Friki Addendum

A chippy in Tooting has taken the non-selling pickled product idea to a bizarre extreme, to the point that one of the pickled onions has actively begun to take root in it's acidic environment.

Despite the fact that Friki is currently on a diet in preparation for bikini season, it still pops in to the chippy from time to time to chart the progress of this unique form of vinegary plant life.