Bikini season

From Frikipedia

Time of year feared by women and loved by men.

Women must spend the runup to bikini season strategically waxing and dieting, in order to look less like a whale trapped in a fishing net when said two piece is slipped on.

Men, on the other hand, can simply lie back, allow their hairy beer guts to flab over their shorts and perv until they go blind. Apart from metros, who want to look slightly less like Bernard Manning and so turn to a desperate combo of rice cakes and the odd smokers-cough filled jog in an attempt to succeed in the quest for a six pack where a gym membership and healthy lungs once failed.

Bikini season begins on Tit Monday.