Alexander Wurz
From Frikipedia
Alex Wurz is a world famous F1 driver, ranking slightly behind Peter Crouch in the list of all-time tallest man-made structures.
Contents |
Early Career
Prior to his life as a quite slow racing driver, Wurz had a litany of other jobs. These include:
- Teaching Elvis Presley how to dance.
- Playing American Football at college level for Alabama. This led to a meeting with President Kennedy.
- Fighting in Vietnam and saving most of Gary Sinise.
- Playing ping-pong in China.
- Being plagiarised by John Lennon.
- Initiating the Watergate scandal.
- Knocking up a stripper.
F1 Career
Despite all this excitement, Alex arrived in F1 in 1998 with a drive with Benetton alongside Giancarlo Fisichella. He hit the ground running, and then just kept on running. Sadly, his career seemed to come to an end in 2000, when he announced to a group of journalists that "I'm pretty tired, I think I'll go home now", which he did.
He returned in 2001 to a far more sedate test-driving role for McLaren, moonlighting for the team when he wasn't investing time in his shrimp fishing business. This lasted until 2006, when he moved to the increasingly desperate Williams team, testing in 06 before getting a full race seat for 07 alongside The Cheese.
The Future
Retirement at the end of 2007.
Rest of life spent raising that creepy kid from The Sixth Sense from his farm in Alabama.
Friki Disclaimer
It is worth noting here, that Frikipedia has never heard of a popular novel and film called Forrest Gump.
