2007 Malaysian Grand Prix
From Frikipedia
McLaren are sponsored by, among others, whiskey makers Jonnie Walker and coffee purveyors Nescafe. Both substances were needed in abundance for any budding fan looking to keep themselves entertained here, as Fernando Alonso proved that any way Kimi can bore us all, he can bore us better.
Contents |
Race Result
1 Fernando Alonso McLaren-Mercedes 56 Laps
2 Lewis Hamilton McLaren-Mercedes +17.500
3 Kimi Raikkonen Ferrari +18.300
4 Nick Heidfeld BMW Sauber +33.700
5 Felipe Massa Ferrari +36.700
6 Giancarlo Fisichella Renault +1:05.600
7 Jarno Trulli Toyota +1:10.100
8 Heikki Kovalainen Renault +1:12.000
9 Alex Wurz Williams-Toyota +1:29.900
10 Mark Webber Red Bull-Renault +1:33.500
11 Boobens Honda +1 Lap
12 Jenson Button Honda +1 Lap
13 Takuma Sato Super Aguri-Honda +1 Lap
AWOL Scott Speed Toro Rosso-Ferrari +????
15 Ralf Schumacher Toyota +1 Lap
16 Anthony Davidson Super Aguri-Honda +1 Lap
AWOL Tonio Liuzzi Toro Rosso-Ferrari +????
18 Robert Kubica BMW Sauber +1 Lap
Rtd Nico Rosberg Williams-Toyota Stupid car
Rtd David Coulthard Red Bull-Renault Needed a shave
Rtd Christijan Albers Spyker-Ferrari Pressed "car on fire" button
Rtd Adrian Sutil Spyker-Ferrari "First corner, wheeeeee!"
Friki Review
In fairness to Alonso, who has spent the last two title-winning years proving that just because The Chin has retired, that doesn't necessarily mean we won't get to watch crushingly dominant drives from the front, he did give Ferrari a chance here. Felipe Massa grabbed pole position ahead of Alonso and Oz GP winner Raikkonen. But Felipe stuck to his self-imposed task of being crap this season, and utterly spazzed his start, allowing not only Alonso, but perma-nice Lewis Hamilton through as well, for a 1-2 set-up that was never realistically challenged on any of the subsequent 56 laps.
The only minor threat had come from Massa himself, scrapping with the rather recalcitrant Tyler in the early stages. Predictably, this resolved itself on lap 6, when Massa managed to cock-up a simple pass and ended up trimming grass at the side of the circuit. The overly charming Hamilton later apologised for this in the press conference, though its clearly not his fault that Felipe has chosen to go back to his ham-fisted roots of poor driving and general half-wittedness. The Brazilian spent the rest of the race toiling behind Ickle's BMW Sauber. A car which he really should have been faster than.
Not as the Oz winner was covering himself in much more glory than his teammate. Kimi mooched around to a disinterested 3rd place, catching Hamilton in the closing stages more because the McLaren driver was getting knackered in the heat than anything particularly special Raikkonen was doing. Kimi's insouciance in the face of the task at hand really summing up the whole day.
Some drivers attempted to put on a show, mind. Alexander Wurz's Williams had barely managed to qualify ahead of the impressively slow Spyker twins on the grid, but he switched to "Run, Forrest, Run!" mode in the race, and was unlucky to miss out on some sort of point. His team mate was more unlucky, The 'Berg spending another race concentrating on driving well rather than hitting things, and was running 6th when his car got buggered by some technical gizmo thingy knackering the car. He's almost beginning to look like a racing driver this year.
Renault were pish. Nowhere all weekend, and it is difficult to see how much is down to the loss of Alonso, and how much is down to a gash car. Billboard Face at least scored a point, keeping the car largely on the circuit this time, but was soundly beaten by team-mate Fisi, who has a history of underperforming when the car isn't quite right, which could infer that in the hands of a proper driver, the results would be a lot better. Either way, they were bobbins.
The Goo were back to sucking even more than daddy Honda after a brief sponsor-impressing stint in the midfield in Melbourne. Once again, in a move destined to annoy the FIA, the Toro Rosso cars failed to turn up. Their sister team did, but probably shouldn't have bothered.
And then there was Jenson Button. Ah dear. Spare a thought for poor Benson, less than 6 months ago the darling of the media, worshipped by ITV and tabloid newspaper alike. Now, Lewis Hamilton features fill the pages of Autosport and the erotic fantasies of James Allen. In just a couple of races, Jenson has almost been forgotton. Not surprising really, when he drives an appallingly slow car, but also drives it slower than even Boobens can manage. If Jenson can improve 3000% in the next race, he might scrape a top 10 finish.
So, even stevens after two events. Both the title contenders have had a chance to win a race at a canter with everyone else struggling miles behind them. For their next trick, Friki would like them to make it interesting...
Friki's Unanswered Questions
- How much of the TV money do STR receive? It's too much, whatever it is.
- Did ITV successfully gloss over Alonso handing Hamilton a sound beating successfully and convince everyone that Tyler indeed was the driver of the day?
Unofficial Friki F1 Race Points in association with Celtic Crosses
1 Alexander Wurz 5 Celtic Crosses (Proved it is easy to overtake, but the big boys can't be arsed)
2 McLaren 4 Celtic Crosses (Ferrari really didn't expect them to be that fast)
3 Ickle 3 Celtic Crosses (He's so ickle)
4 Boobens 2 Celtic Crosses (Beating mighty Jenson is pretty funny)
5 Adrian Sutil 1 Celtic Cross (Crashing at the first corner helped wake Friki up)
6 Nico Rosberg 1/2 a Celtic Cross (Stupid car being stupid)
Unofficial Friki F1 Championship Standings in association with Celtic Crosses
=1 Alexander Wurz 5 Celtic Crosses
=1 Lewis Hamilton 5 Celtic Crosses
3 Nico Rosberg 4 1/2 Celtic Crosses
=4 Adrian Sutil 4 Celtic Crosses
=4 McLaren 4 Celtic Crosses
6 Ickle 3 Celtic Crosses
=7 Boobens 2 Celtic Crosses
=7 Mark Webber 2 Celtic Crosses
9 Kimi Raikkonen 1 Celtic Cross
10 The Goo 1/2 a Celtic Cross
